Living room fryer causes fire; no, that’s “alcoholic” causes fire because, well, you won’t believe this one…
Story from “This is True”by Randy Cassingham, with his “tagline:â€
“COUCH MEAT AND POTATOES: Police in Columbia, Mo., responded to a report of a house fire. They arrived to smoke — and screams for help. The four officers used their batons to help smash through the front door, and rescued a victim inside while keeping the flames at bay with fire extinguishers from their cars. Manuel Douglas, 56, explained that he had been cooking a pork steak in the deep fryer he has next to his living room couch, and fell asleep. The fryer set the room on fire. (Columbia Tribune) …What, and he couldn’t spray beer on it from the tap next to the easy chair?â€
Randy, you’ve been reading this Report! The story didn’t mention alcohol…and many readers would have figured he must have put in a hard day at work and was simply tired. However, given the percentage of fires involving alcohol or another drug, the explanation likely isn’t so innocuous.
In Drunks, Drugs & Debits, I cited a National Council on Alcoholism finding that “alcoholics are ten times more likely to die from fires than non-alcoholics.”This supports the idea that addiction is behind 90% of all fires, particularly where the victim falls asleep while doing something dangerous.
The fact that Manuel Douglas had a deep fryer next to his living room couch qualifies as dangerous. While he escaped Father Death this time, at 56 he’s no doubt running on empty. Instead of making the cut to the Darwin Awards he makes it to this pre-cursor, both populated by alcoholics. And by the way, if alcohol causes a problem, the problem is alcohol”which is called alcoholism.
Douglas’ method is a creative alternative to something many alcoholics have done over the years: set themselves on fire by smoking and falling asleep. More than four pages in Drunks is devoted to detailing the numerous indications of alcoholism in actress Bette Davis (if you haven’t pulled out the book for a while, this section is a great read, beginning on page 166). One of the clues was that she “set her own bed on fire a few times”while chain smoking cigarettes.
(Story and tagline from “This is True,”copyright 2008 by Randy Cassingham, used with permission.)