A drunk isn’t shy
Alcoholic Antic-of-the-Month
Nathan Ryan Baird, 26, entered a bar in the ski town of Mammoth Lakes, California, took off all of his clothes and went to sleep on the couch in front of the fireplace in the presence of about 150 patrons. Baird was arrested, booked and released. The next day, the Mammoth Lakes Police Department received two reports of stolen vehicles within minutes of each other–a Ford Expedition and a Toyota 4-Runner, both while left idling in driveways. After a pursuit, Baird, fully clothed, was apprehended in the Expedition. Police later figured out that Baird stole the Expedition, but switched to the Toyota. After finding that the Toyota was nearly out of gas, he took it to a Chevron station, realized he didn’t have the key to the gas cap and ran back to where he left the Expedition and took off.
As usual, the alcoholic could have qualified for a Darwin Award, but lived. He didn’t die in the snow of frostbite and didn’t kill himself or anyone else on the road. But he could have.
These antics were probably not Baird’s first brushes with the law. Society likely long ago earned the right–in fact, obligation–to coerce abstinence. The fact that it hasn’t acted could have cost lives and in countless similar cases, has.