Mother from hell is a likely alcoholic.
Dear Doug: Mommie Dearest goes to school
Dear Doug:
My 10-year-old daughter, Laurie, is being bullied by one of her classmate’s mothers. She elbowed my daughter once and purposely slammed a door in her face. Her daughter does the same sort of things. The school principal reluctantly agreed to separate the girls, despite the fact that school staff thinks this woman is wonderful. I know that she is a lying, manipulative, power abusing woman who seems to know exactly who she needs to charm. Is there anything I can do?
Signed,
Abused
. . . .
Dear Codependent,
Some people know exactly who they need to charm to get what they want, and who they can abuse without fear of repercussions, all with the goal of inflating their ego by wielding power over others. Such power-seekers are almost always alcohol or other-drug addicts.
Other columnists might suggest asking the principal to make sure the woman keeps her distance from Laurie. However, if she’s an addict she will find a way to continue the bullying, which serves to inflate her ego. Such columnists might also suggest teaching Laurie to stand up for herself and, the next time the woman touches her or slams a door in her face, to yell “OW!” as loudly as possible to attract attention. Yet there is no one as credible as an alcoholic–and she will be far more convincing than your daughter to those nearby when denying culpability for wrongdoing. Simply stated, sometimes there is little that can be done.
Unfortunately, the best option despite other objections is to remove her from the school. The mother will be forced to find someone else to abuse and your daughter’s accusations will later ring true. There is power in numbers and sometimes the only way to increase the number of abused is to make someone else available. Until your daughter leaves the school it will be your daughter’s word vs. hers. Because she’s probably an addict, without irrefutable proof of wrongdoing, she will win–because in her mind, she must, regardless of who she harms.
(Source for story idea: Annie’s Mailbox, June 4, 2007.)