What would you do…if you’re driving your truck on a hot early evening, your dogs need to be cooled down and the truck needs a wash—and you are drunk off your ass? (TAR Lite # 17)
1. Turn on the air conditioning and carefully head home to wash your truck?
2. Turn on the air and, when it doesn’t work, roll the windows down and carefully head home figuring you can wash the truck another day?
3. Head to a nearby lake, take your dogs for a swim and, when it cools down, head home and wash your truck?
4. Since you’re too drunk to drive, pull over before your kill someone?
5. Go to a nearby lake and drive your truck, including the dogs, into it, up to your door handles?
Congratulations if you selected # 5, which is what an unnamed, heavily intoxicated man, age 49, did in Calhoun County, Michigan. Sheriff’s Deputies were called after two fisherman told authorities they saw a pickup truck drive into the lake; they found the 1988 Chevy Silverado stuck, with water up to the door handles. The man reportedly drove into the lake because “his dogs were hot and he was going to cool them off and his truck needed a wash.”
A non-alcoholic wouldn’t drive drunk. Alcoholics suffer from confabulated thinking and, in particular, experience euphoric recall and impaired judgment. The former causes the addict to view everything he does through self-favoring lenses, resulting in egomania; the latter causes him to do idiotic things like drive trucks into lakes.
We’ve all heard, “Truth is stranger than fiction.” This is true because the variety of antics in which alcoholics engage is endless. Truth would not be stranger than fiction without alcoholism. Ironically, we owe a debt of gratitude to alcoholics for making life more interesting than it would otherwise be.