The trouble with Al-Anon
Beverly writes:
“I am a long time member of the Al-Anon/Alateen Family Groups and I hope that in your literature that you have made a reference to us. All those that are addicted affect so many other lives and those others can get the support and recovery they need by attending Al-Anon/Alateen meetings. ”
I responded:
Yes, I mention Al-Anon, especially in my first book (Drunks, Drugs & Debits). While it’s an excellent organization with many meetings in which there is good, solid recovery, I have some issues with many members. One is with the idea that many Al-Anoners seem to have: alcoholism in a close person is “not our business” and we cannot or should not diagnose alcoholism in others. Yet, the addict is incapable of self-diagnosis (see Vernon Johnston’s work as well as mine for a detailed explanation). Therefore, it is incumbent upon the rest of us to diagnose addiction–and pro-actively intervene, _before_ tragedy happens.
In addition, there are numerous miscellaneous issues, such as “What’s wrong with you that got you involved with addicts in your life?” asked by sanctimonious Al-Anoners. Nothing: just watch Al Pacino’s portrayal of Lt. Col. Frank Slade in the greatest alcoholic movie of all time, “Scent of a Woman.” He sweeps the young lady onto the dance floor and teaches her the tango–and he’s blind. Who wouldn’t fall in love with him?
I didn’t learn about alcoholism in Al-Anon. Understanding, for me, was 9/10ths of my recovery. I’ll give you a clue: the explanation for abusive behaviors is the same as for the extraordinary alcoholic charm readily observable in so many practicing alcoholics.